Delusion

          Julia was sitting in the park. She had done an unusual thing today. She had cancelled all her appointments. She wanted an answer. An answer from herself. Not from him. It was getting crazier day by day. Perfectly normal days would get thrown out of gear everytime she was in his company. This was insanity. 'How can I get so emotional ?' she thought. This was not the first time....
                       She had met Ritchi (Richard) at Suzan's house. He was her cousin. It was the reapeated meetings with Suzan that she got acquainted with him more often. He was going steady, Suzan said. Julia couldn't care less. She had her own things she had to focus on. Life was good. One day at the party Ritchie hosted for his birthday, he did something that started all this 'feelings factory' as Julia liked to call that. He had invited her. She had come to like his unusual ideas about life, his child like enthusiasm on everything and he was likeable stuff. Plus he had a taste...'taste for the best in everything'. He could go to any length for example to get that perfect Brownie. So everyone consulted him when it came to food or getaways or just anything. Sometimes she felt he had the bug inside him that made him suggest 'the best' just about anything. He had read some of the things she wrote and liked them. He encouraged her too. One day on his birthday, when he had suggested to her about the best book to read, she was startled. 'I mean he could have suggested any book in the world but why this ?' Oh ! she loved books and to share the same book....Anyways he started talking about the protagonist and Julia wanted to stop him. He was very talkative and he went on airing his opinion. Sometimes whe wished he shut up. He wouldn't. He was cocky at times. Arrogant too. But he had the charisma to make people like him. She left the party disturbed. She had started to like him. She was afraid of herself. Days went by and she had met Elen his girlfriend too. Julia was surprised at his choice though.
                     She looked for the meaning of the word 'delusion'. Right. Believing things that were untrue with intensity that yes it is true. She had to stop herself from believing that she was in love with him and vice versa. She saw a squirrel struggling with a leaf. How simple life could be for this four legged-one tailed animal ? She couldn't do it i.e. stop herself from thinking about him. She had been busy last fifteen days thinking nothing but work work and work when she bumped into him yesterday and the mind started working overtime. How does one control emotions ? She was where she was because of her emotional involvement with her work. But he was all flesh and blood, not some abstract object. To get emotionally involved with him was not proving anything. She got up. She decided she would tell him she liked him. That's it. She called him.
'Hey Julia what's up ?' he asked. 'Nothing special Rich'. 'So what does our lady want to speak ?' 'You', she said. 'What ?' he asked. 'You. I love you. I had enough of this dilly dallying with myself Rich, I don't care what you think about me. I know you have Ellen but that doesn't change anything about what I feel about you.' There she felt so light as if she had the moral responsibility of saying those three words and she had done it. 'Julia, let's meet and talk.' He said. 'Wow' he didn't get upset or anything ! Wants to meet. What the heck ? I'll go prepared for his 'No'. All I wanted for him to know, I did. Rest doesn't matter. I'll take care. I can handle.' She was elated.